The 1 Rule of Relationship Success for Life Success
There really is just one rule of relationship success for life success.
Have you ever met the person going through a divorce or have you gone through a divorce? Or met the person struggling at home with a spouse? I don’t think I could characterize them as moving toward success. In fact, I just spoke with a team mate of mine about this very subject. He looked tired and down. When I asked what was wrong, it was the story I had heard dozens of times before. He was having troubles with his spouse.
If the home life is not stable, happy and rewarding then the rest of life will suffer. I know this to be true and so do you. The core strength of a happy, successful life is the health of your home life. Relationship success is life success.
I CAN CHANGE THEM
There is a common theme among most all of the people I talk to with who have a rocky relationship. They all want to change their spouse. And to compound the problem their spouse is trying to change them. They both end up frustrated, angry and disappointed with each other for not changing.
There really is only one solution to this most common problem: Accept them as they are and be willing to spend the rest of your life with the person they are today. If you can’t do this or can’t imagine the next 20-30 years of your life with the person they are now, then talk with your spouse. Think about it long and hard and decide to stay or go.
NO YOU CAN’T
It’s simple and difficult. I can only guarantee one thing – if you continue to try to change them and do not accept them as they are, misery, frustration and an eventual bad breakup is the future. Start by changing yourself and you may be surprised to find that they change, too.
A successful leader, business person, or stay at home mom must be able to draw strength from their home life and it starts with the spouse. When your home life is amazing and your relationship is rewarding, the challenges at work and in life seem smaller. Life has a rich and sweet texture. This attitude will flow to those around you and will attract positive people and success into your life. Life success is a complete package and your love life is a big part of that package.
Accept the person you are with or move on. All aspects of life will be better in the long run.
DO I STAY OR GO?
Only you can answer this question. Will you accept your significant other as they are? Or will you continue to try and change them? If you truly accept them as they are, then you’ve taken the first step to staying and building a beautiful relationship.
The only person you can really change is yourself. Start there. Ask your partner where you could improve. Find out what annoys them or frustrates them. Put your ego behind your desire to have an awesome, strong and passionate relationship. Accept that you may be at least partially responsible for any friction in the relationship. I’ve discovered that by working on myself and making improvements to my own behavior, my wife wants to do the same. I don’t even have to ask. She’s just curious to know how and why I’ve changed in noticeable ways. And I tell her exactly what I’m doing and why.
However, if you can’t accept them as they are then maybe it’s time to go. Remember, assume that the person they are now is the person you will spend the rest of your life with. They may or may not change. It’s simple and difficult but totally worth it. Be courageous. Ask yourself the hard questions. Take action and create the life you deserve.